Deaf and Hard-of-Hearing Women Are Speaking Up!
Deaf Women’s Voices from the YouTube Channel Hamonthly
Deaf and Hard-of-Hearing Women Are Speaking Up!Deaf Women’s Voices from the YouTube Channel Hamonthly※ As women’s call for an end to hate and discrimination gains momentum online and reverberates through the streets, we record these new voices of feminism and the diverse actions they take. This project is carried out with the support of the Korea Foundation for Women’s fund for Gender Equality and Social Development. -Editors
“I’m a Deaf Korean.”
Though I go by Ha Gae-Wol (“Ha Monthly”), my ID reads Kim Ha-Jung, as does my Korean family registry. I turned 31 this year. It’s the second year I’ve been on YouTube.
The description of my YouTube channel reads “I’m a Deaf Korean.” Korea’s deaf population is portrayed in the media chiefly as having faced and overcome adversity and as needing sympathy, particularly women who are deaf or hard-of-hearing. With a deaf person in charge of the planning, filming, and editing of broadcasts, my YouTube channel breaks away from deaf people’s depiction as pitiable. I want to show how fully a deaf woman can lead an independent life.
Though I often share the story of how I got started on YouTube, I don’t mind retelling it as it gives me a chance to remember the Twitter user Ibangin [“Stranger”] who first suggested I try this out. Just as there are some who claim they embarked on their journeys alone and without help from anyone, others say they started with the help of those around them. I am among the latter. I refer to Ibangin each time because it would be unimaginable for me to have set out alone.
It was the winter of 2017. We were having a get-together for the deaf and hard-of-hearing, and since YouTube was in full tilt in Korea by that time, our conversation shifted to YouTube as well. At that point, Ibangin had been busy online, anonymously speaking their mind on deafness-related issues. When they suggested offhand I “take a shot at YouTube,” I resisted, saying I hadn’t thought much about it.
“Me? A YouTuber?”
Then one day I happened upon Ibangin’s Twitter account. Seeing how active they were on Twitter was a revelation. If they can plug away on Twitter, why can’t I tell my story on YouTube? So I got started. I am not exactly the type who buckles down with single-minded resolve. I’m spontaneous. If it’s going well, I keep going. If it’s not, I stop. I’ve stuck with these values so far, and I continue to upload videos once a week.
A Mother with Two Deaf and Hard-of-hearing Kids and an Umbrella
Hold that thought. In order to understand the person I’ve grown into, I really need to tell you about my mom at this point. In the first few months after starting on YouTube, I uploaded a video of a conversation with my mother (April 13, 2018, “Hamonthly’s Mom on Raising Two Deaf and Hard-of-hearing Kids”) and the response was substantial. One viewer was inspired by my mother’s approach to our education, another said they had become my mom’s fan. I want to share an episode from my childhood that I will never forget.
I was in elementary school. Just as I was heading out in the morning, my mom told me to take my umbrella because it was going to rain, but I ignored her and went on to school. The sun was shining, so I thought, “What rain?” But as school let out, lo and behold, an afternoon shower rolled in. Looking around, I saw my friends’ parents who’d come to pick them up promptly pull out umbrellas and whisk their kids home, safe from the rain. I dawdled, wondering if I might be next, but found it doubtful that my mom would show up. I ran to the pay phone, put a coin in it, and called home.
“Hello? Mom, it’s me. It’s raining a lot. How do I get home?” “Since you didn’t take your umbrella, figure it out on your own.”
I arrived home in tears. But then my mom welcomed me inside, drenched as I was. She explained that getting rained on was the cost of my actions.
Hearing viewers say they’ve started learning sign language
From when I uploaded my first video on Jan. 7 of last year, not a day has passed that I haven’t thought of YouTube. It’s become routine. Each day is meaningful to me, but if I had to pick one aspect as my favorite, it would be when deaf and hard-of-hearing viewers leave comments expressing their support and appreciation for my videos.
In particular, those who, like me, learned sign language later in life and end up facing identity problems, or are hit with the loneliness that can arise in friendships, or face difficulties in school, etc. In one of my videos I talk about the “solitary meal” (eating alone), and some viewers told me in the comments that they wanted to hug me. I was just telling my story, but countless comments expressed “thank you for easing my pain”. It has been at these points when I feel all the more determined to keep steadily doing YouTube.
There are also times when hearing people email or message me to say that my videos have inspired them to start learning sign language. These make me feel like I’m doing a good job on YouTube. A while back, I received a message from a subscriber saying that she had finished her beginner class and was preparing to start intermediate level, and that she would be able to study harder if she received a message of support from me. I look forward to someday meeting her and chatting in sign language.
Of course, it’s not always rosy. A week after the first video was uploaded, someone left a nasty comment:
“...? her pronunciation is fucking retarded.. she probably can’t hear how stupid she sounds eh? lol”
I can’t imagine how bored you need to be to write this. Regardless, should such comments get out of hand, I plan to sift them out, screenshot them all into a document, and report it. (It’s a shame I haven’t gotten more.)
When other deaf people disparage me, though, I’m totally at a loss. I suppose if 90% of viewers like my videos, the other 10% are bound to hate it. But at least hate it for a good reason. Seeing both “I don’t know sign language!” and “Why don’t you use sign language!” has me stumped. A deaf person uses sign language on YouTube and viewers grumble, but then when she talks on her videos, they ask why she doesn’t sign. Whose tune should I dance to? Such critics are quick to pester others while doing nothing themselves. If only they would focus on their own work first.
Talking feminism in the deaf community: Why you feel uncomfortable when you meet me
There was no special motivation for my interest in feminism. It was simply my realization that in the course of my life, I had been experiencing sexism.
From the beginning, who did I spend the most time with? Family. Throughout childhood, while there weren’t issues with my immediate family, the holidays provided plenty of uncomfortable situations when we would gather with relatives. The daughter-in-law was always designated to prepare food for the memorial service each holiday, and once all the relatives were sitting around, the men would eat at a big table and the women at a small table. I knew something was off, but I couldn’t speak out as I was far too small and young at the time.
It continued to go on like that through my teenage years, and it wasn’t until a new aunt (the wife of my father’s youngest brother) joined the family that things began to change. She wouldn’t put up with the nonsense. She hated the division of work into men’s and women’s and she hated being expected to adapt to it. My grandparents were powerless in the face of her arguments. Maybe it’s because my aunt was smart. It no doubt helped that my mother had already grown so fed up with her in-laws’ patriarchal customs that she had stopped going to their place in the countryside. In any case, I saw plainly how positive change can come about when a person speaks up.
I have also faced discrimination when I was looking for work. Fortunately, since the company I worked at was one where women held leadership roles and could speak out, I was spared any particularly big problems. However, almost all the company’s executives and board members were male.
This seems to be the same within the deaf community. When voices cannot be heard, gender discrimination and stereotypical gender roles in our community will persist. Knowing the risk better than most, I was fearful of uploading a video on feminism, but I nonetheless went for it.
The feminism-oriented video, posted on May 17th of last year under the title “The reason why you feel uncomfortable when you meet me,” sparked a greater response than expected and many deaf and hard-of-hearing women related to it. The video was filmed with YouTubers Izaka, Danny, and Jong, who as part of the deaf and hard-of-hearing community shared their support for feminism. Communicating in sign language, our discussion ranged widely, from the debate about male reverse discrimination to the Me Too movement in the deaf and hard-of-hearing community, sexual assault within the disabled community, and future steps we need to take, as well as sharing of relevant feminist texts.
I chose to title the video “The reason why you feel uncomfortable when you meet me” because people can get uncomfortable during a conversation when one takes a feminist viewpoint. In these instances, people often cut me off or change the subject, but this just compels me to make them even more uncomfortable. I produced this video with the awareness that women who are at last starting to speak out will be making the world more and more uncomfortable as their voices grow louder.
For those viewers who continue to feel uncomfortable with feminism or with deaf and hard-of-hearing women making their voices heard, this is my message:
I’m sure many of our viewers may feel uncomfortable seeing deaf and hard-of-hearing women speaking up. But we have to keep talking, and frankly, I hope people continue to feel uncomfortable. Deaf and hard-of-hearing women continuously endure uncomfortable situations—not just me, all of us. Let me talk a bit about the discomforts we face. For those viewers who are feeling uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to start a dialogue.
Featuring women on YouTube in great numbers
One the characteristics of my Hamonthly videos is that they spotlight women. Why do I want to tell more stories about women? Because I am a woman.
As a woman I can more readily empathize with women’s stories, and as we talk I can set them at ease and draw them out. It isn’t that I don’t want to hear men’s stories, not at all. Rather, my hope is that I can amplify women’s voices. I know better than most what it means to be born as a woman in Korea. I have experienced the patriarchal system of Korean society—and I continue to. I have experienced in the countryside men and women eating separately. It took me a long time to get to the table, and I have also knocked it over once or twice.
Additionally, deaf and hard-of-hearing women suffer double discrimination for being both disabled and female. The latest video, titled “You're Deaf, so marry an ordinary man,” was released on June 2, 2019. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCaJ9ykP84g
Feminist YouTuber Izaka and I were originally trying to cover deaf people’s stories in time for Korea’s Deaf Awareness Day, June 3rd. But it kept feeling a bit insufficient, like a cupcake with no icing. As I was looking at our list for the video’s participants, I suddenly realized they were all women. There was one man, but our lineup was full, and he was last to join, so we postponed his involvement. At this point, an idea hit me.
I proposed we film deaf and hard-of-hearing women recalling things people have actually said to them, and Izaka was immediately on board. So we filmed, edited, and then uploaded the video on Deaf Awareness Day. The video, which reveals in ugly detail the extent to which deaf and hard-of-hearing women are judged, sexually objectified, and verbally harassed, garnered myriad comments and reactions of empathy from both hard-of-hearing and unimpaired women.
The video was released not only on Izaka’s and my YouTube channels, but also on the Facebook page of “Deaf and hard-of-hearing People Changing the World.” Abbreviated as “Seba-nong”, the Facebook group brings together deaf and hard-of-hearing women. In a society where being “disabled” and being “female” both make you the target of hostility, Seba-nong members gathered to redress prejudices against deaf women and challenge the cultural tendency to center on the hearing unimpaired and on men. Since forming in June 2018 and operating largely through social network platforms, the group has been continuously engaged in producing video and mobile-friendly news content as well as translating videos from the international deaf and hard-of-hearing community into Korean. For a [Korean-language] detailed introduction to the group, read their full write-up here: “How Seba-nong is Changing the World” (Make Your Seoul, March 9, 2019). https://brunch.co.kr/@makeyourseoul/32
My hope is that more and more deaf and hard-of-hearing women will begin to shout their stories for the world to hear. With feminism surging into the spotlight, women are more courageously voicing their opinions. I know deaf and hard-of-hearing women can do so, too. Tell us about the injustices you face. I’m sure you have a tale from your days you can share with us. I’m ready to dive into your story.
I also want to tell the story of those in the deaf and hard-of-hearing community who are unwed mothers and immigrant women.
There are countless videos produced by hearing women. They are filmed and edited with content on a range of topics and social issues. Right after some event, they can immediately start filming and editing and then the video related to the event is uploaded the next day. It’s almost real time. I’d love to be able to do this, but there’s only one of me, so I’m restricted. There are so many stories I want to share with everyone—deaf, hard-of-hearing, and hearing alike—and it’s a shame I can’t tell them all. At first I stewed over the lack of visibility the deaf community receives in Korea, but when I recognized such brooding was a luxury and that I could do something, I just started making videos.
In the future, I hope to share stories about bullying, pregnant women, unwed mothers, women putting their careers on hold for childrearing, dating violence and sexual assault, and domestic violence, as well as about multicultural and immigrant women. This is not simple work. It is a characteristic of video media that you have to show the real thing rather than a pixelated version if you want to impart a sense of realism, and in the case of discussing such topics as these, showing people’s faces poses real risks. After a little more deliberation, I hope to cover some of the above subjects.
As a deaf woman, if I am presenting my life for the world to see on YouTube, going forward I want to talk not only about my life but—one by one—the many other stories women have to share.
“Oh, by the way—Subscribing always helps! You haven’t forgotten to click subscribe, right?”
Hamonthly’s YouTube channel is funded by donations. Kakao Banking 3333-09-1677065 Kim Ha-jung
※Hamonthly on YouTube https://youtube.com/hamonthly ※Seba-nong’s Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/pg/changedeaf2018
Published: July 6, 2019 Translated by Taylor Kennedy *Original article: http://ildaro.com/8499
◆ To see more English-language articles from Ilda, visit our English blog(https://ildaro.blogspot.com).
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